Monday, February 3, 2014

Looking Back and Looking Forward

Sometimes David misses the orphanage and wishes he could return to that familiar place where he spent almost 9 years of his life. From the first afternoon in our home when his silent sobs became loud cries of “I want to go back!” to more recent tears over missing his old friends and feeling like this isn’t really his “home.”

And I “get that” because sometimes I want to go back to the old life too. When I wrote Prepared? just before we brought David and Daniel home, it was with some genuine and fearful questioning, “Are we really ready for the huge changes this is going to bring into our lives?”

Some days I think about the Israelites who longed to return to Egypt when they were wandering in the desert. And I know David can relate with their feelings too. The old, familiar life can look pretty appealing, especially on challenging days.

Yes, David and Daniel are officially in our family, but it takes time to feel connected and bonded. We don’t have the history together. There’s a lot we’ve missed in each others' lives. These past three and a half months we’ve been getting to know each other and learning how to be a family together. This is A Different Kind of Birth. And there are grafting pains.

But this is what I’m trying to remember: Don’t give into discouragement on the hard days. Allow space and time to grieve what is gone. But keep looking forward and trust that God has led us on this journey and He will hold our hands every step of the way.

 The LORD replied, “My presence will go with you and I will give you rest.” (Exodus 33:14)


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